If images we are constantly bombarded with
can be seen as beautiful;
How come there are so many of us
who think we are ugly?
Maybe we don’t look in the mirror enough.
Monday, August 2, 2010
Life Vines
Just a little something
It was about a year and a half ago
when our Life Vines first started to entwine
And, like our fingers interlaced
now I cannot tell where I end
and you begin
And this whole time
our Life Vines have pulled us in
I have been consumed by you
It's hard to be Human these days
Title is so wrong, but I'll live.
It’s intense;
missing you while you’re already here.
And it seems that every time I’m with you
I miss you all the more
Thoughts of a Former Acrophobic
Acrophobia: extreme or irrational fear of heights.
You’ve said,
That at this time
We’re the closest we can be.
But maybe that’s just it.
When you’ve reached your highest point,
do you still keep climbing?
or do you just wait to fall?
Maybe this is what Love is all about.
Living and Loving
without fear of falling.
Because at least when I fall
I can fall for you all over again.
You’ve said,
That at this time
We’re the closest we can be.
But maybe that’s just it.
When you’ve reached your highest point,
do you still keep climbing?
or do you just wait to fall?
Maybe this is what Love is all about.
Living and Loving
without fear of falling.
Because at least when I fall
I can fall for you all over again.
Spin Cycle
Your voice on the line.
I tell you I’m fine.
My stomach churns
and my tears come
to wash away my emotions.
I tell you I’m fine.
My stomach churns
and my tears come
to wash away my emotions.
fingertips
You write love on my arms,
which means you save me.
But saving me means you can only keep me
from falling off the ledge, while
I’m still there.
I clutch to you while I feel you pull away.
It’s worse than not being with you at all,
and I think,
Ending all communication would be easier.
I have to stop needing you somehow.
I don’t want to love you anymore.
I want to fall in love with you again
which means you save me.
But saving me means you can only keep me
from falling off the ledge, while
I’m still there.
I clutch to you while I feel you pull away.
It’s worse than not being with you at all,
and I think,
Ending all communication would be easier.
I have to stop needing you somehow.
I don’t want to love you anymore.
I want to fall in love with you again
Sunday, August 1, 2010
the magnificence of another's life
I hope I never get to the point where I don't feel like I want to know more about a person's life. I wish I knew more about my friends, I wish I knew more about my family. I have always been the awkward one who had trouble maintaining relationships (though not through lack of interest). People who (think they) know me might be very surprised to find out that I really enjoy talking to people. By this I mean I enjoy conversing when I am in a comfortable setting.
For whatever reason I have been told I've come across as anything from annoying (I concede), insane (granted) to a snob. While I will pay the first two, the latter continues to confuse and upset me. The only conceivable explanation for this is that I find it difficult to talk to people (especially for the first time). I can't help feeling self-conscious and inadequate and boring. While I may like talking to people, it still takes a considerable amount of time before I let my guard down.
I am very good at acting confident. I guess this is where the notion of my being a snob comes in. People see me being confident and approachable with my friends, then get offended when I don't approach them or I don't lead the conversation with as much gusto. This doesn't happen often as I'm only really ready to let my guard down when the other person has demonstrated that I can trust them (and it very rarely works the other way).
In short, I guess this all comes down to my terrible self-esteem (which I refuse to do anything about)
This is why I find it much easier to watch and observe passively. You may think it's sly and creepy of me, but I really don't mean any harm. Other people just interest me, which I why I like this collection of finds.
On a different note, being one of the younger ones does have its disadvantages. I'm not talking about the obvious ones where I can't go partying with my friends because I'm not really into that. I'm talking about the realisation that people around you are growing up and you know you're next. I know I shouldn't, but I find the future depressing. It scares me, and I hate it for all the reasons people love it. You never know what's going to happen.. All my friends in the level above are about to graduate from their last year of high school. After that, their whole lives are in front of them. I'm terrified for them, but I'm more terrified for me. I am confident that all of them will find their feet and their way around the world. They'll move on from high school, become independent, make new friends and I don't know what I'll do without them.
It's all just one step closer into adulthood.
For whatever reason I have been told I've come across as anything from annoying (I concede), insane (granted) to a snob. While I will pay the first two, the latter continues to confuse and upset me. The only conceivable explanation for this is that I find it difficult to talk to people (especially for the first time). I can't help feeling self-conscious and inadequate and boring. While I may like talking to people, it still takes a considerable amount of time before I let my guard down.
I am very good at acting confident. I guess this is where the notion of my being a snob comes in. People see me being confident and approachable with my friends, then get offended when I don't approach them or I don't lead the conversation with as much gusto. This doesn't happen often as I'm only really ready to let my guard down when the other person has demonstrated that I can trust them (and it very rarely works the other way).
In short, I guess this all comes down to my terrible self-esteem (which I refuse to do anything about)
This is why I find it much easier to watch and observe passively. You may think it's sly and creepy of me, but I really don't mean any harm. Other people just interest me, which I why I like this collection of finds.
On a different note, being one of the younger ones does have its disadvantages. I'm not talking about the obvious ones where I can't go partying with my friends because I'm not really into that. I'm talking about the realisation that people around you are growing up and you know you're next. I know I shouldn't, but I find the future depressing. It scares me, and I hate it for all the reasons people love it. You never know what's going to happen.. All my friends in the level above are about to graduate from their last year of high school. After that, their whole lives are in front of them. I'm terrified for them, but I'm more terrified for me. I am confident that all of them will find their feet and their way around the world. They'll move on from high school, become independent, make new friends and I don't know what I'll do without them.
It's all just one step closer into adulthood.
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